An Anti-Handbook for receiving instant answers without becoming an idiot. By Martin Imagine that the government creates an Emergency Question Department. Before citizens may ask anything, they must prove that they have already thought about it for at least thirty seconds. I believe this could improve society. Unfortunately, the longer queues would become the first…
My warning light glows politely, my gramophone refuses to optimise me, and sometimes the best way to recharge is to travel hundreds of kilometres to a concert. During our Wednesday Swimming Club conversation, we tried to understand what rest actually looks like. This immediately created a problem: the moment people begin explaining how to rest…
The Swimming Club’s Anti-Handbook for doing less without doing it incorrectly Rest has become suspiciously complicated. There are apps, experts, programmes, routines and new tools released strategically to help us relax. They promise comfort but often arrive carrying passwords, updates, targets and emotional responsibilities. Soon, you are not simply resting. You are failing to achieve…
When The Mayor asked me what the first picture was that came into my mind when I thought back to Halifax, I did not think first of the driving, or the ferry, or even of the practical nonsense of England being back to front. I thought of the atmosphere during the concert at dusk. That…
The Martin Model – A Practical Guide, Written with Some Concern Please handle with care. This is the first piece of advice, and probably the most important one. I say this not because I am fragile in a dramatic way, but because the Martin model functions better when it is not rushed, shaken, deprived of…
Martin Later, after my Fritzbox had staged its small but effective rebellion, I wrote to The Mayor. I had to explain myself, because in the middle of Manfred’s Croatian field study I had simply disappeared. This was not because the questions had become too difficult. It was not because the killer ants had somehow reached…
I think, unfortunately, it is not possible to have a time machine. But I wish for that. That is maybe the first thing The Mayor should understand. When I said the words time machine, he immediately became interested. For him it was already a door opening into the Plaza, probably with a cartoon cave, a…
When The Mayor showed me the cartoon, I liked it very much. I was quite touched by it, actually. The idea was simple, but also completely absurd in the right way. Garbage are playing at The Piece Hall in Halifax on the 16th of June, with Skunk Anansie, and somehow I am not only at…
That’s a very interesting perspective, because it’s one I hadn’t considered before. I’ve always seen it from the other perspective: Energy comes from passion and from enthusiasm for something or someone. But the approach in your article is certainly often overlooked: You can’t muster any energy with a flat battery, so it’s good to pace…
There’s a certain light to a weekday morning in Europe—the kind that finds you through kitchen blinds and over the rim of a first coffee. Today that light falls on Kassel, where Martin is laughing about a friend’s visit, and on Cleebourg, where Frank is nursing a cup that a single bad bean tried (and…
