Puzzles, and Malibu: Finding My Balance in a Busy Life

Some days begin with coffee and a clear plan. Other days begin with stress.

When Fruitloop asked me how I was doing, my answer came quickly: stressed. Work had been particularly challenging. The number of orders wasn’t the problem. It was everything else. Customer questions, complaints, declarations of conformity, customs paperwork, and all the little tasks that seem to arrive at exactly the wrong moment.

To make things even more complicated, I still had customs declarations to complete for two customers in Switzerland. One shipment looked simple enough, but the second could easily turn into several pages of paperwork. Everything had to be entered into the customs portal before two o’clock so that I could receive the export documents the following morning and hand the shipment over to the freight forwarder. As I explained all this, Fruitloop simply listened while I tried to untangle the mess in my head.

Luckily, not everything in life is customs declarations and customer complaints.

A few days earlier, Fruitloop had sent a list of future discussion topics. As I looked through them, a few immediately stood out. Active rest appealed to me because it perfectly described one of my favourite hobbies: building puzzles. In fact, my next puzzle is already waiting for me. Another topic focused on finding rest in a busy life, something that feels especially relevant when balancing work, children, household responsibilities, and everything else that fills a calendar.

The day’s discussion focused on relationship balance. Fruitloop reminded me that relationships aren’t only about marriage. They include family, friends, colleagues, children, and everyone we interact with.

When she asked who was easiest to talk to in my family, the answer was simple: my middle sister.

I have two sisters and two brothers. Although I am usually considered the middle child, both of my sisters are older than me. My middle sister and I speak almost every Sunday. We talk about everything. Looking back, I probably shared more with her than I ever did with my mother. Boyfriends, problems, worries, life decisions—she was always the person I turned to.

The conversation then moved to family life at home. When Fruitloop asked who makes me laugh the most, I thought about it for a moment. When the children were younger and learning to speak, they often said hilarious things without meaning to. Today, however, I would probably say my daughter. Sometimes it’s something she says, and sometimes it’s something she does. Either way, she can still make me laugh.

Work relationships can be just as important as family ones.

For me, the easiest colleagues to work with are those who listen carefully, take notes, and don’t require the same explanation ten times. I appreciate people who actively look for ways to help, answer the phone when it rings, and take initiative.

Fortunately, life is not all about work.

One of my closest friends and I enjoy sitting together in our open-plan dining area, talking about life. She usually starts with coffee, while I limit myself to one coffee in the morning and try to drink two litres of tea throughout the day. Later, we might switch to Malibu with pineapple juice, sparkling wine, or something equally relaxing.

We don’t have a fixed schedule for meeting. In fact, we recently spent part of our holiday in France with her family. I saw her again two weeks ago, but most of our visits happen whenever our calendars somehow line up. Her daughter and my son attended the same primary school class years ago, which helped create our friendship.

Interestingly, she is usually the one who makes the plans.

When Fruitloop asked why I rarely organise the meetings myself, my answer was simple: I don’t have time.

Still, she is a wonderful motivator. Recently she suggested that I call her whenever I go for a walk. I promised I would, although my motivation for walking hasn’t been very strong lately.

One thing that definitely motivates me is playing darts.

This week I attended a tournament that started at one o’clock in the afternoon and didn’t finish until after nine in the evening. It was pure me time.

Twenty-eight players competed, divided into several groups. Unfortunately, I didn’t make it beyond the qualifying round. I lost several matches and won one. My very first game was against a player from my own team, which wasn’t ideal. However, the story improved during training the following day.

About thirty minutes before training ended, one of the stronger players announced that he needed a “victim” for a practice match. To my surprise, he pointed directly at me.

I accepted the challenge.

And then I won.

That made everyone laugh, including me.

Although I dream of reaching the semi-finals or even a final one day, I know I still have a lot of work to do before I reach that level. For now, simply improving and enjoying the game is enough. League matches will start again in September, and the tournament schedule should arrive in July.

One part of the conversation made me smile.

Fruitloop asked what I would do if the children wanted to attend a tournament with me.

I told her I would explain that it would be boring for them. Sitting for hours watching people playing dart matches isn’t exactly every child’s dream day out. In fact, my daughter asked recently if she could come along, and I told her no.

That tournament was my me time.

Fruitloop agreed completely. She reminded me that relationship balance also means knowing when to step away for a while. Taking a few hours for yourself doesn’t make you selfish. It allows you to recharge, return with more energy, and be fully present for the people you care about.

By the end of our conversation, I felt a little lighter.

The workload was still waiting for me. The customs declarations still had to be completed. The customers would still have questions. But there would also be puzzles waiting to be built, dart matches to play, friends to meet, and perhaps even a glass of Malibu with pineapple juice on the terrace.

And sometimes, finding balance is simply remembering that all those things matter too.