The Art of the Friday Unpause
Some mornings feel like they were scripted by a very tired comedian.
I’m sitting at my laptop with a first cup of coffee, a dull headache, and a nose that has decided to retire from breathing. Outside, the neighbors are singing “Happy Birthday” to someone over the phone. I can hear every enthusiastic, slightly off-key note.
I think about my son at school, likely nursing his own stuffy nose and a heavy case of the exchaustion. He got out of bed all by himself this morning, no complaints, no fights and I didn’t even wake him. Where other days, we were running late for school, fighting over doing homework and getting to bed early. Life is currently a collection of small, relatable chaos.
My brain is doing that thing where it builds a skyscraper of “to-dos” before the caffeine even hits my bloodstream.
- This meeting.
- That meeting.
- The Bluetooth speaker for Mom.
I have four of those marvelous little gadgets. I love them. I love music. And yet, looking at the speaker, I realized I haven’t actually listened to anything lately.
No reading. No music. No favorite shows.
It’s not that the time disappeared—it’s that I stopped making room for it. I’ve been so busy building a “side-hustle,” pouring energy and motivation into a new path, that I forgot to pack the things that make the journey fun. And I forgot the meaning of “fun” and “relax”.
Yesterday, a lady in a car tried to rewrite my morning script.
She drove like a maniac, stopped at a four-way, and decided the best use of her lungs was to shout at my son and me through her window. The look on her face was priceless. The more I think about it, the funnier it gets. She was fuming! We couldn’t hear anything, but I can guess the words coming out of her mouth; what a waste of her breath and energy. Shame.
I was too sleepy to react. If I’d been more awake, I might have given her a standing ovation for the performance or a thumbs-up. My son just watched her with a puzzled frown, and we spent the rest of the drive laughing at the “crazy lady”. Why did she choose anger and violence? What was she angry about?
I’ve spent 24 hours checking the “mental replay” of that moment. Did I do something wrong? No. I am sure I followed all the rules, and my guess is, maybe she didn’t see me drive in the left lane when she turned into the right. Maybe she scared herself, because she was driving fast, recklessly, and acting crazy.
Maybe she just needed to let the rage out to feel better. I even looked for her in the sea of cars this morning, ready to give her a giant Friday smile and a wave.
She wasn’t there. Maybe she chose the bed over the battle today.
I’m a person who lives by the schedule. It works for me because I love planning ahead. What do I have to do and remember? What is important, when do I have meetings?
Right now, my schedule is almost non-existent. It’s a bit like trying to walk on a floor that’s still being tiled. But slowly, I’m finding my feet. New-ish routine, new to-do list, and planning in a different way. Sometimes failing and sometimes winning, this the best part.
I have been questioning my values, too. Am I doing the right thing? Am I being ridiculous? But I came to realise that I am somehow on the right path. I’m realizing I’m not being stubborn, and I’m not in the wrong. Sometimes you are just on a path that requires a bit more grit than you expected. Courage and conviction.
The birds are singing outside. There is no laundry staring at me today. No cleaning lists. Just the coffee, the quiet, and the realization that things change. I am changing, I can feel it, and I should trust myself and the people supporting me and surrounding me with love and care.
Maybe that’s the point of everything happening at the moment. Change, acceptance, trusting the process and having the courage to stay brave and true to who you are.
I think I’ll go turn on one of those four Bluetooth speakers now with another cup of coffee.
